Introverts Face Challenges in an American World of Extroverts

Introverts Face Challenges in an American World of Extroverts

By Jeffrey M. Bowen

Are you an extrovert, introvert, or somewhere in between?  Your personality type dictates a likely answer. Each type has a particular way of interacting with the world, acquiring information, and deriving energy from their surroundings.  Neurological studies suggest that our hard wiring has lots to do with it.  To be sure, neither style is wrong.  They are just different.      

At one end of the spectrum is the extrovert, typically said to have a dynamic and positive personality. These people are energized by the external environment and tend to be gregarious, sociable, assertive, and comfortable in the spotlight.  Risk takers and quick decision makers, they enjoy team efforts.

 At the other end of the spectrum are introverts.  They enjoy alone time and are more introspective.  Typically serious and quiet, their strengths include independent thinking and listening.  Although they often make excellent scientists, artists, or writers, their contributions may be overlooked because they avoid attention and prefer to stay to themselves.

Why is it important to recognize and account for the differences between extroverts and introverts?   The dominant American “culture of personality” definitely rewards extroverts, but since at least a third of us are introverted to some extent, the traditional social demands of daily life in this country can be stressful, exhausting, and a cause of low self-esteem and guilt.   

 Our bias toward extroverted personalities is obvious in worlds of media entertainment, organizations and business, and quite dramatically in national politics.  In her best-selling book Quiet (2012), Susan Cain explains how Dale Carnegie and Toastmasters have historically promoted extroversion a trainable skill.  Terms like “smoozing”, being a go-getter, selling yourself and thinking on your feet are prized in the American business world.    

Introverts find it difficult to act this way. Social anxiety disorder is a term doctors use to describe their fears.  In particular, fear of public speaking is considered by many second only to dying.  Deep roots can be found in school settings.  Curriculum may be differentiated, but progress toward goals depends greatly on group projects, presentations, and social relationships.  Social and emotional learning may seem effortless for extroverts, but the teamwork it demands can literally sap the energy of introverts.

 Of course, there are ways to overcome this, for example by encouraging individual initiatives and independent down time.  Many educators and organizational leaders are realizing that this practice helps everyone, including extroverts, become more imaginative and creative.  

Let me hasten to caution that introversion and extroversion lie on a continuum.  Different situations produce different outcomes.  Thus many introverts who prefer quiet evenings at home with family or a couple of very close friends become adept at creating an extroverted persona that appeals to a large circle of colleagues at work.

Besides adaptability, complementary relationships show winning results.  When one partner is an introvert, and the other an extrovert, if they adjust to one another’s habits and preferences, and communicate openly, the dynamic can be productive.  Famous examples include Franklin and Eleanor Roosevelt, Barack and Michelle Obama, and Steve Jobs with Steve Wozniak as co-founders of Apple, Inc.

Are extroverts happier and more successful as leaders?  The answer may depend on the strength of an individual’s self-confidence, the context, and in the eyes of the beholder as well.  Analyses of business leader styles suggest a lean toward extroverts, while recognizing that both types can be very capable and effective.

Extroverted leaders thrive in a group of people and make immediate connections and friendships.  They tend to be quickly decisive.  They may be strongly committed to causes and vocal about it, so passion counts.  However, as Susan Cain points out, “There’s zero correlation between being the best talker and having the best ideas.”

On the other hand, introverted leaders can be great listeners and thus may be more approachable.  Their style encourages employee loyalty, and they get lots of work done.  Introverts are socially sensitive and may be insightful when conflicts arise and arbitration is needed.

In short, there is no ideal personality when we try to relate to one another.  We are bound to encounter every variation in school, work, or life.  What matters the most is accepting your predispositions and building on the strengths they represent.