Mentoring Produces Results at Home and School

 

Mentoring Produces Results at Home and School

By Jeffrey M. Bowen

What makes mentoring a different kind of relationship in your life?

No single synonym completely captures its essence, but words like counseling and problem solving, developmental partnering, and trustful caring come into play. At least two people should be engaged, a mentor and a mentee, and the connection works when it involves open two-way communication. The popular assurance, “I’ve got your back,” applies.

Contrasts describe what mentoring is not. A mentor does not insistently advise, critically evaluate performance, or warn mentees, “Follow my way or the highway.”

When opportunities and commitments are encouraged by listening instead of judging, the experience becomes universally positive and memorable. Effective mentoring is confidential and uniquely personal, that is, person to person. While it may create rewarding teamwork, coaching a team toward victory does not really fit mentoring. Yet when individualized, it can indeed.

Chances are that parents and teachers come to mind first. The presence of an adult in a young person’s life can be a powerful influence especially when it involves listening and sharing knowledge. Adults fulfill a mentoring role when they facilitate learning, model positive behaviors, and stand in their children’s emotional corner.

 My parents acted as mentors especially when they listened without criticizing, asked leading questions, and when they showed me how to exercise skills and talents that otherwise I might never have discovered. I gained confidence because they believed in me and cheered me on.

 When my wife and I became parents, we tried to guide our children in this same way. For instance, my wife loves to cook. Sharing her talents with our grown daughter has nurtured common ground for wonderful cuisine as well as mutually gratifying communication. My spouse serves as a sounding board for our daughter’s challenges as a parent, and so the mentoring cycle continues.

A New York City court clerk named Ernest Coulter is recognized as the founder of American mentoring programs. In 1904 he observed that too many young boys coming to the courtroom were risking a stint in “reformatory” because they lacked contact with a caring adult. Coulter’s effort to recruit members of local churches to guide fatherless boys one-on-one led to the 1909 founding of the Big Brothers movement.

A parallel effort in Ohio produced a counterpart through Catholic Big Sisters.  A century later, with endorsements and advocacy from multiple presidents and Congress through the years, Big Brothers Big Sisters (BBBS) is now a thriving international association involving 360 affiliates.

Proof of dramatic success comes from a well-designed 1995 national study of BBBS. A thousand demographically diverse adolescents from BBBS agencies were screened and selected to participate in the research. Half were carefully matched with a volunteer mentor who met with them three times a month for an average of one year. The other half were placed on a waiting list, and they served as a control group; that is, they were not matched with a mentor and did not receive BBBS services at least during the time of the study.

The youngsters who met regularly with a mentor proved 46 percent less likely than the control group to abuse illegal drugs, 27 percent less likely to begin using alcohol, 52 percent less likely to skip school, and 33 percent less likely to hit someone. Related evidence confirmed increased academic confidence and stronger parental relationships. The longer children participated, the less they focused on specific problems or activities, and the more they seemed to appreciate just having someone to confide in and look up to.

Nowhere are mentorships more prevalent than in our schools. The influence of teachers on students is well known, but teacher-to-teacher mentoring may be less familiar to many.

 As a district office administrator I was privileged to work for more than a decade with dozens of mentor teachers who were matched with newer teacher mentees by subject or grade level.  Results were gratifying for the participants because experiences and advice could be shared confidentially. Rules of the bureaucratic road could be communicated comfortably. Instructional resources could be identified. Mentees were asked to continue an additional year, with time set aside for book studies and group discussion.

Because schools are learning organizations, the positive effects of mentoring reinforce consistency and a positive climate among all staff and students. I certainly witnessed this as a charter school evaluator and mentor. For seven years I relied on a performance review system whose research verifies an eight percent gain in student achievement due to factors of social climate. It should be no surprise that students who feel safe and valued may thrive academically.

A crucial aspect of creating a productive school climate proved to be the extent to which the school principal mentored a cadre of seasoned, trustworthy mentors, with whom she consulted frequently. The principal modeled mentoring, encouraging an open-door policy, as did I in my role as both her evaluator and mentor.

In a small elementary school with just two paired teachers by grade level, mentoring “on the fly” occurred constantly. Partnered teachers shared promising instructional practices and consulted on individual student behavioral issues. Within these grade groupings, teachers not only supported and counseled one another, but nurtured teacher assistants and newer employees among all grades, doing so informally and with encouragement from an open-minded administrative staff.

Much to its credit, New York state has promoted consistent standards for mentoring programs and internships. The state teachers’ union (NYSUT) has been deeply involved in this effort since 1986. The State Education Department has been awarding two-million-dollar grants for mentoring programs since 2018.

 Finally, using a research-based model, the state Council on Children and Families supports and sponsors school-based one-on-one mentoring programs for volunteers who must be at least 18 years of age. They are screened, trained, and matched to children in their communities. Descriptive brochures are available for this ground-breaking strategy.

We have enhanced and institutionalized mentoring programs because they have yielded positive results at so many levels in schools, businesses, and society. We must recognize that mentoring may well begin at home with parents and other willing adult models throughout our communities. Whatever the approach, it will usually succeed when there is a conscientious reciprocal commitment between mentor and mentee. The impact is lasting and uniquely personal.